I AM THAT GIRL: My Own Author By Alexis Jones

I've just stumbled upon this great article about staying true to who you are regardless what society expects from you. In this world it is hard to be who you are because we often fear rejection and judgments not only from other people but mostly from our loved ones. This article is trying to convince us, that we need to continue fighting for what we believe in and mostly staying who we really are. Enjoy! It definitely is worth a read!

Picture: tumblr.com

 It’s not just our body image that we struggle with in life. Whether we are too curvy, too thin, too tall, too short, too tan or too pale; it’s easy to recognize the narrow definition of beauty that makes us all feel chronically insecure. I had a conversation in the car with my best friend recently, and it dawned on me that these unoriginal molds, silent expectations and paradigm influencers go much deeper than us merely comparing ourselves to unrealistic, unattainable, airbrushed perfection.

In one little word, an entire world of limitation exists — should. All the things we think we “should” do serve as a form of internal incarceration. Although I’m not necessarily proud of this fact, I am a “people-pleasing perfectionist.” I want to be liked by everyone, even you as you read this blog. On top of this impossible and challenging mission, I want to do everything perfectly and anything that falls short of that insane expectation is fair game for the Simon Cowell critic in my brain who tries to convince me that I’m not good enough. Somewhere along my life’s journey, I was convinced that perfection and pleasing were noble and desirable pursuits. I have actually set myself up for misery, failure and unimaginable disappointment.

In the world of “should,” there is no room to be real, honest or vulnerable. In a world of “should,” we live by everyone else’s invisible rules. We are governed by expectations most of us created when we were kids from the kind of person we marry to the car we drive. What I’ve come to realize is that when we allow ourselves to be on autopilot, we hand over our pen to someone else and ask them to author our lives, taking a backseat to their rules and slip comfortably into their mold for our lives.
I certainly am not impervious to the pressures and expectations that influence my life, but at least I’m aware that they exist. My insatiable desire to be liked and to pursue perfection at all costs has and continues to produce an inauthentic projection of who I want people to think I am. The true definition of empowerment is the mere recognition of choice and that is where I now choose to live. Not in a world of “supposed to,” but in a world of questioning what I think, feel, want and need. Only in that space, am I granted permission to think for myself, to assign my own meaning, to date a guy who’s “not my type,” to be open to possibilities and pencil my own mind-blowing adventure story. 

I’ve been a rebel my whole life, never fitting in and always asking why. The poet E.E. Cummings perfectly articulated life’s greatest challenge when he wrote, “To be nobody but yourself in a world that’s doing its best to make you somebody else, is to fight the hardest battle you are ever going to fight. Never stop fighting.” My challenge for you, for me, for all us is to fight to make your own decisions in life, to create your own rules and write your own personal constitution, only ever looking for your own approval.
We are infinitely unique and when we stand confidently on our own two feet, we enter into a reservoir of unfathomable power, unconditional love, creativity, honesty and passion. Whatever you are seeking already exists within you; the answer, wisdom, eloquence and truth you desire are all inherently yours. So take a deep breath with pen in hand, and write your story.

Source: http://www.iamthatgirl.com/2012/02/27/my-own-author-by-alexis-jones/ by Alexis Jones

=] <3 don't forget to smile.
Ezzy